There are so many lists of what I need to improve upon this year! The old goats of weight loss, debt reduction, being nicer, eating healthy, walking more take up space time and time again, as I willfully choose to not actually meet them head-on.

And there are more interesting things out there anyway. Like, learning new ways to communicate better with the Hubz, learning to cook with an InstaPot, yoga and qigong practices.....

When they all sound and feel good, where do we begin?

  1. Begin with writing down all of your goals, hopes, intentions without censorship, justification, judgment. All of them. Have at it.
  2. Indicate which go together or are similar
  3. Prioritize in each of your categories
  4. Find the roots 1 or 2 goals/intentions that when focused on and carried out will begin a cascade effect toward shifting the others.

The root of it all.

I would venture from experience, so it's not so much a guess as it is an observation, that the very things we want to tackle, overcome, achieve, triumph over.....are symptoms rather than the root.

Let's take dandelions, for example. My grandfather would go around to each yellow head in the green, green yard and drop one drop of weed killer on each flower. He did not want a yard full of toxins, nor did he want this infesting nuisance. He would straighten, look over at the neighbor's yard and sigh "But I can't expect my neighbor to do the same thing." You have to remove dandelions from the root. Then it is gone. No bloom, no seed head, no propagation. There is always the hope that your best behavior will inspire those around you.

It is here that I must diverge to say that my husband knows the dandelion is the healthiest yard crop for us: from root, to leaves, to blossom. Don't eat the seeds, however.

To go after your goals and intentions, go for the root. likely our overspending, overeating, overindulging, overjudging, underloving, underboundaried, underachieving is set on narratives that are now rotting within us, waiting for a soul gardener to come along and dig out the extended mess, so the healthy roots can take over.

What are your narratives? They are likely the excuses you use to not do that which you desire to do or to become. The things we think, feel, tell ourselves are truth are most often lies that we have believed into truth.

  • My parents did not love me
  • I was told I was ugly my whole childhood
  • I won't amount to anything
  • I'm no good
  • I don't deserve it
  • Everything I do is ignored
  • I'm invisible
  • I will always be fat because I'm big boned
  • I'll always be poor

Ask yourself:

  • Is it true?
  • Why?
  • What happened?
  • Who said it to me? Why did I believe it?
  • What else was going on?
  • Why do I believe it still? What am I now doing to ensure it is a reality?
  • Is it happening now?

Be honest. Be brutal. Be vulnerable in your assessment.

Then get on with getting rid of the root, and planting a new root that is lifegiving and real. 

You own your life. No one else does. Believe it.